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The Platitude Sickness: The Trash of Corporate Writing

Welcome to the resistance.

Cover photo: @jerrysilfwer

Thereโ€™s a platยญitยญude sickยญness in corยญporยญate writing.

Iโ€™m a PR proยญfesยญsionยญal.
And I someยญtimes hate what I do for a living.

Most norยญmal people hate corยญporยญate bullยญshit. As a writer, I loathe those corยญporยญate platยญitยญudes with a feverยญish intensยญity. But my corยญporยญate brothยญers and sisยญters cling to them. And it seems as if itโ€™s getยญting worse.

What can we do about this platยญitยญude sickness?

Here we go:

Symptoms of Platitude Sickness

Platitude Sickness: Trigger List

I hate corยญporยญate platยญitยญudes everyยญwhere I see them. I swear, a kitยญten dies every time. 

A black and white clip art illustration of a sad kitten
Save the kitten.

โ€œA platยญitยญude is a trite, meanยญingยญless, or proยญsaยญic stateยญment, genยญerยญally dirยญecยญted at quelling social, emoยญtionยญal, or cogยญnitยญive unease. The word derives from plat, the French word for โ€œflat.โ€ Platitudes are geared towards presentยญing a shalยญlow, uniยญfyยญing wisยญdom over a difยญfiยญcult topยญic. However, they are too overยญused and genยญerยญal to be anyยญthing more than undirยญecยญted stateยญments with an ultiยญmately little meanยญingยญful conยญtriยญbuยญtion towards a soluยญtion.โ€
Source: Wikipedia 1Platitude. (2023, December 9). In Wikipedia. https://โ€‹enโ€‹.wikiโ€‹peโ€‹diaโ€‹.org/โ€‹wโ€‹iโ€‹kโ€‹iโ€‹/โ€‹Pโ€‹lโ€‹aโ€‹tโ€‹iโ€‹tโ€‹ude

Hereโ€™s my โ€œtrigยญger listโ€ of platitudes:

  • โ€œSynergyโ€ = Overused to the point of becomยญing meanยญingยญless, it refers to the coรถperยญaยญtion of two entitยญies to proยญduce a comยญbined effect more sigยญniยญficยญant than the sum of their sepยญarยญate effects.
  • โ€œLeverageโ€ = In a busiยญness conยญtext, this is often used to mean using someยญthing, such as a resource or an advantage.
  • โ€œDisruptiveโ€ = Refers to techยญnoยญloยญgies or innovยญaยญtions that disยญturb estabยญlished marยญkets or processes.
  • โ€œPivotโ€ = A funยญdaยญmentยญal shift in strategy or approach is often used for minor changes.
  • โ€œValue-addโ€ = A term that refers to an eleยญment someยญthing gives that someยญhow enhances it, but itโ€™s often unclear what value is being added.
  • โ€œBleeding-edgeโ€ = Refers to the absoยญlute latest or most advanced techยญnoยญlogy or innovation.
  • โ€œActionableโ€ = Generally refers to strategies or insights that can be acted upon, but are often used loosely.
  • โ€œHolistic approachโ€ = An approach that conยญsiders the whole situยญation or sysยญtem rather than focusยญing on indiยญviduยญal parts.
  • โ€œScalabilityโ€ The abilยญity of a sysยญtem or a modยญel to handle growth is often overused.
  • โ€œGame changerโ€ = An event, idea, or proยญcedยญure that affects a sigยญniยญficยญant shift in the curยญrent way of doing or thinkยญing about something.
  • โ€œParadigm shiftโ€ = A funยญdaยญmentยญal change in approach or underยญlyยญing assumptions.
  • โ€œCutting-edgeโ€ = Like bleedยญing-edge, it refers to the latest or most advanced techยญnoยญlogy or innovation.
  • โ€œThought leadยญer.โ€ = An indiยญviduยญal or firm recogยญnized as an authorยญity in a speยญcialยญized field.
  • โ€œEmpowerโ€ = To give power or authorยญity, but is often overยญused without conยญcrete meaning.
  • โ€œInnovateโ€ = A buzzword for makยญing changes in someยญthing estabยญlished, espeยญcially by introยญduยญcing new methยญods, ideas, or products.
  • โ€œLow-hanging fruitโ€ = The easy tasks or probยญlems to tackle first, but can be seen as a clichรฉ in busiยญness language.
  • โ€œOutside the boxโ€ = Used to refer to creยญatยญive thinkยญing, but has become a clichรฉ.
  • โ€œStreamlineโ€ = Simplify or make someยญthing more efficient.
  • โ€œStrategic alignยญmentโ€ = Ensuring that the plans or activยญitยญies of a comยญpany are coรถrdinยญated and conยญsistยญent with its objectives.
  • โ€œCustomer-centยญricโ€ = Placing the cusยญtomยญer at the centre of a comยญpanyโ€™s philoยญsophy, operยญaยญtions or ideas.
  • โ€œRobustโ€ = The overยญused term implies that a product, serยญvice, or strategy is strong, durยญable, and able to withยญstand demands or difficulties.
  • โ€œEnd-to-end soluยญtionโ€ = A serยญvice or product that solves a probยญlem from beginยญning to end, but is often seen as a buzzword due to vague definitions.
  • โ€œUnprecedentedโ€ = Overused to describe anyยญthing thatโ€™s nevยญer happened before, often loses its impact due to freยญquency of use.
  • โ€œBreakthroughโ€ = A sudยญden, draยญmatยญic, and importยญant disยญcovยญery or develยญopยญment, but is often overยญused to describe minor advancements.
  • โ€œOptimiseโ€ = To make the best or most effectยญive use of a situยญation or resource, but it is often overยญused and can lead to ambiguity.
  • โ€œBandwidthโ€ = Originally a techยญnicยญal term, itโ€™s now used metaยญphorยญicยญally to refer to someoneโ€™s capaยญcity to handle tasks or issues.
  • โ€œEcosystemโ€ = Refers to a comยญplex netยญwork or interยญconยญnecยญted sysยญtem, espeยญcially in the conยญtext of busiยญness envirยญonยญments or technologies.
  • โ€œAlignmentโ€ = Frequently used to describe the proยญcess of bringยญing difยญferยญent aspects or departยญments of a busiยญness into harยญmony or agreement.
  • โ€œAgileโ€ = Originating in softยญware develยญopยญment, itโ€™s broadly applied to describe flexยญibยญilยญity and adaptยญabยญilยญity in variยญous busiยญness processes.
  • โ€œDeep Diveโ€ = Used to describe a thorยญough anaยญlysยญis or examยญinยญaยญtion, but often overยญused to mean any detailed look.
  • โ€œTouch Baseโ€ = A casยญuยญal way to refer to checkยญing in or folยญlowยญing up with someone, but it can be seen as a clichรฉ.
  • โ€œGranularโ€ = Describes lookยญing at someยญthing with a high level of detail, but it is often used unneยญcesยญsarยญily instead of simply sayยญing โ€œin detail.โ€

Getting rid of corยญporยญate platยญitยญudes is an uphill battle. They are such a waste of editยญorยญiยญal space and only lead straight to mediocrity.

Join the resistance!

Learn more: The Platitude Sickness: The Trash of Corporate Writing

Itโ€™s Not My Fault, I Swear

As a corยญporยญate writer since 2005, one could easยญily assume I am responsยญible for at least two hunยญdred shitty press releases. But Iโ€™m not, I swear.

Every time I present someยญthing to an organยญisaยญtion, I speak plainly. When I write, I always rewrite to avoid clichรฉs. I strive to add some bounce to my copyโ€‰โ€”โ€‰if nothยญing else, to preยญvent tired and stale senยญtences that ring too familยญiยญar. 2At this point, I should point out that English is my second lanยญguage and that I do most of my writยญing in Swedish. Still, I strive to improve my busiยญness English.

I do my best to avoid platยญitยญude sickness.

But my efforts donโ€™t always pay off.

While some organยญisaยญtions appreยญciยญate my efforts, a sizeยญable porยญtion of everything Iโ€™ve writยญten for cliยญents has passed through numerยญous filยญters before publication.

And the resยญult is nothยญing but a dwindยญling tirade of corยญporยญate cringe.

Not. My. Fault.

Oh, How I Loathe Corporate Cringe

Iโ€™m not alone in being frusยญtrated. Weโ€™re all exposed to corยญporยญate speak. These platยญitยญudes are everyยญwhere in marยญketยญing and communications. 

And for some reasยญon, platยญitยญudes are becomยญing the go-to format for all corยญporยญate texts. Itโ€™s getยญting worse, not better.

I someยญtimes think this is a pidgin lanยญguage for difยญferยญent busiยญness tribes. We fall back on corยญporยญate platยญitยญudes to let everyยญone know we belong in this money-makยญing space. Ensuring we belong to a comยญmunity is more importยญant than makยญing sense. 3Pidgin lanยญguages are a mixยญture of two or more lanยญguages, and they typยญicยญally develยญop when two groups in conยญtact with each othยญer canยญnot speak each othยญerยญโ€™s lanยญguage. Many pidgin lanยญguages have evolved โ€ฆ Continue readยญing

Itโ€™s mindยญbogยญgling how many hours organยญisaยญtions spend proยญduยญcing utter garbage.

The โ€œCarpe Diemโ€ Business Mafia on LinkedIn

Corporate platยญitยญudes are such a waste of editยญorยญiยญal space. Unfortunately, platยญitยญude sickยญness tends to do quite well on social media.

A text loaded with obviยญous stateยญments and no actuยญal subยญstance can still attract a lot of social engageยญment. People often hit that โ€œLikeโ€ butยญton (emoji butยญton or whatever) without readยญing the linked article. 

Yes, Iโ€™m lookยญing at you, LinkedIn.

Itโ€™s essenยญtial to have a strategy.

Always put the cusยญtomยญer first.

Be proยญactยญive and think long-term.

Publish epic content.

LinkedInโ€™s โ€œcarpe diemโ€ busiยญness mafia canยญโ€™t get enough of that stuff, right?

Join the Resistance

Yes, getยญting rid of corยญporยญate platยญitยญudes is an uphill battle. There are so many filยญters and so many readยญers who donโ€™t mind.

Still, there are no excuses for givยญing up. As comยญmuยญnicยญatยญors, weโ€™re catchยญing peopleโ€™s interest and makยญing it worth their time. As we fall deepยญer into the attenยญtion ecoยญnomy, relยญevยญance and subยญstance are the only things that can save us.

We might nevยญer win this fight, I admit. But even if we canยญโ€™t win, we can at least make life a bit more difยญfiยญcult for everyยญone who comยญmits corยญporยญate BS.

So, how do you comยญbat platยญitยญude sickยญness in corยญporยญate communication?

Make it your misยญsion to find platยญitยญudes and desยญtroy them. And donโ€™t let your colยญleagues get away with using them, either. As this becomes a rituยญal, youโ€™ll develยญop an โ€œallergyโ€ to corยญporยญate platยญitยญudesโ€‰โ€”โ€‰and removยญing them will make you feel better.

Welcome to the fight. Youโ€™re in the army now.

Signature - Jerry Silfwer - Doctor Spin

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1 Platitude. (2023, December 9). In Wikipedia. https://โ€‹enโ€‹.wikiโ€‹peโ€‹diaโ€‹.org/โ€‹wโ€‹iโ€‹kโ€‹iโ€‹/โ€‹Pโ€‹lโ€‹aโ€‹tโ€‹iโ€‹tโ€‹ude
2 At this point, I should point out that English is my second lanยญguage and that I do most of my writยญing in Swedish. Still, I strive to improve my busiยญness English.
3 Pidgin lanยญguages are a mixยญture of two or more lanยญguages, and they typยญicยญally develยญop when two groups in conยญtact with each othยญer canยญnot speak each othยญerยญโ€™s lanยญguage. Many pidgin lanยญguages have evolved into full-blown languages.
Jerry Silfwer
Jerry Silfwerhttps://doctorspin.net/
Jerry Silfwer, alias Doctor Spin, is an awarded senior adviser specialising in public relations and digital strategy. Currently CEO at Spin Factory and KIX Communication Index. Before that, he worked at Kaufmann, Whispr Group, Springtime PR, and Spotlight PR. Based in Stockholm, Sweden.

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